


Ho Ho Hell No

by Rowan_Rites



Series: Deceitber 2019 [2]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Deceitber 2019, M/M, Snow, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:27:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21686785
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rowan_Rites/pseuds/Rowan_Rites
Summary: Deceit hates snow. Not that he's seen it, but the concept is gross. Remus decides to take it upon himself to fix this. Part two of Deceitber: reaction to snow!
Relationships: Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders
Series: Deceitber 2019 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1559326
Kudos: 73





	Ho Ho Hell No

Deceit was not fond of the cold. Not even a bit. Between his snake half and a general sensitivity to the cold, he always wrinkled his nose in disgust while the others babbled about snowball fights and sledding. It just wasn't his thing. He preferred staying indoors, with a cup of tea or cocoa and hot fire and as many blankets as he could get his hands on. Christmas for Deceit was more about the cooking, the inside decorations, warm sweaters, and big mugs of cocoa.

He had never even seen snow. Just the sight of it made him shiver. Gross, wet, and freezing cold fluffy stuff out of the sky? No thank you.

One day, Remus asked Deceit why he never went outside during the holidays. "Oh, and get covered in sticky, white, freezing cold bits of water? Oh, absolutely. I surely wouldn't freeze to death, or shiver the whole time," Deceit responded, snorting before he took another sip of his tea.

"Wait. You mean you've never even SEEN snow in person?! That's crazy!" Remus cried.

Deceit shrugged. "I am not a fan of the cold. You know that. I am more than content to sit in here and read while you cause mayhem in your winter wonderland with Roman. I don't like snow.

Remus decided to change this. The next day, he peeked out and grinned. The snow was thick, with big beautiful flakes and huge snowdrifts. There were icicles along the eaves - or as Remus called them, disappearing knives - and the trees were covered in the white snow. Remus nodded once before running off.

"Oh, Dee!~" he sang, skipping into the kitchen. Deceit was making some ramen noodles on the stove for both of them.

"Hello, Remus. I hope you're not hungry," Deceit replied, smiling lightly. He had two bowls ready, and two mugs of Remus' favorite bright red apple cider.

"Oh, I am. But first, I have a surprise for you!" Remus chirped in response. He scooped Deceit up into his arms and spun him a couple of times, grinning widely.

Deceit let out a squeak that morphed into a hiss. "Thisssssss was most ccccccertainly warranted!" he shouted, a look of fake contempt on his face. Remus knew he loved this deep down. No one could get to Dee quite like Remus.

"Oh, but my dearest lucky snake eyes," Remus replied, his voice oddly warm and rich. "The surprise is worth it."

Deceit's human side flushed red at the pet name. "Very well," he sighed. "Let's see what grand surprise you have waiting for me.

Remus stepped out of the kitchen, then tossed Deceit over his shoulder and snapped, changing both of them into thick snow coats, tall boots, waterproof mittens, and knitted scarves to match knitted hats. Then he took off running toward the front door, holding tightly onto Deceit's waist as he did.

"Remus, what in the world- WAIT! NO! NOT THAT!" Deceit shouted, slowly realizing what Remus' plan was.

But he was too late. Remus rammed through the door and jumped, landing facedown in a snowdrift with his arms still wrapped around Deceit's waist.

Deceit gasped as he hit the cold, and started struggling against Remus' grip. Then he suddenly stopped. Remus suddenly thought maybe the shock had made him pass out, maybe he was more sensitive than he thought and had passed out from hypothermia immediately, maybe he was just hugging the corpse of his love.

Remus rushed to push up onto his hands, looking at Deceit. Deceit was staring at the sky, seeming in awe of the snowflakes swirling out of the grey clouds. "Oh, it's horrible," Dee breathed, a wide smile reaching all the way up both sides of his face, the snake side even cracking a grin that showed his sharp fangs that Remus loved to see.

Remus breathed a sigh of relief and propped himself up on one elbow to join Deceit in looking at the sky. "I know you've never really seen snow. And I just thought how tragic that was! You've never seen me decapitate snowmen, or draw dicks so big only a helicopter could see it. And you've never had a snowball fight! So... I decided you needed to see it for yourself. See what all those stupid cheesy-ass songs are about," Remus explained.

Deceit tore his gaze away to look at Remus with the same wonder and awe as he had looked at the snow, and Remus felt something in his chest. Like he'd swallowed a heating pad and it was stuck in his throat (not that Remus would ever do that).

"You kidnapped me to throw me into a snowdrift," Deceit asked, laughter dancing in his eyes despite the seriousness of his tone.

"Well, everything's more fun if I get to kidnap a sexy motherfucker like you!" Remus replied.

Deceit finally laughed, once again showing those lovely fangs. "Well. Since we're out here, I suppose we should make a snowman for you to kill," he said.

Remus pumped both fists into the air excitedly, before Dee added, "After we eat lunch. I'm not hungry."

"Aww, come on! Stop leading me on like that!" Remus pouted. But he let Deceit take his hand and drag him inside. 

**Author's Note:**

> My first attempt at Dukeceit. Goofy babies. I loved this tbh


End file.
